FRIDAY FUNNIES ETC.

Just when you thought it was safe to go in the water.

My son sent this because I like Adult Coloring Books.

I could send this to my son but he might not think it was funny.

Would have been my husband's tattoos for sure!

Don't awaken Luke when he is about to catch a mouse in his dream.

Did you know March 30th is official Welcome Home Vietnam Veteran's Day?

 

 

 

WHERE ARE THEY

Lately, I have been going through my Roller Blog on my sidebar wondering about my blog friends who have simply dropped by the wayside.  Sadly, I did learn that one has died and that makes me wonder if the same fate has befallen others.  

I also wonder how many simply abandoned Blogger for Facebook. A few said they were leaving because they were no longer inspired.  Many had changed their blogs to private. Surprisingly I found two who were still blogging but their updates had stopped appearing like Tabor's did for a while.  It is sad that I didn't go back and look for them earlier.  

What are your plans for announcing your departure if you leave Blogger? Do you have someone who will post on your behalf if you shuffle off this mortal coil? Guess I could call this post my second Question Of The Week for this week.  Inquiring minds...

WORDS FOR WEDNESDAY

River of DriftingThrough Life has again provided our Words for Wednesday.You can see what others have done in the comments on her site or here in my comment section or on their own blogs (if they tell us).  Hope you will join in with your story or poem. 

Good words River. Thanks!

angry, tried, street, slashed, astounded, swore,

and/or:

involved, solitary, longest, change, library, needling

SNAPPED by Granny Annie

The young couple stood on the street corner. You could tell that the man was very angry. Pedestrians attempting to cross at the light tried to give them a wide berth as they passed the pair. Someone had dialed 9-1-1 and thankfully the police arrived just as the man pulled a knife. He slashed at the woman and swore at her. She was astounded by his sudden militant action.

Thankfully a solitary individual had decided to get involved and had called for help. The woman was able to change direction and ran toward the library steps. The angry man followed her and the police officers pursued him. The police managed to corner the man and demanded he drop the knife. It seemed like the longest time before he complied with their order. The officers placed handcuffs on the deranged man and as they led him away he was mumbling, “She just kept on needling me....”

Next Month's WFW will be brought to us by Lee, from the Kitchen Connection.
Don't forget to hop on over, she's bound to have some good words.
Every Wednesday in April.

LETTING GO

I wrote this 12 years ago and posted it on this blog that I had just started.  You can see where my concern was that day.  Last night there was a seminar on long term planning and I was glad that I already have a living will.

LETTING GO

Never force me to linger long
For your sake,
Staring into anguished faces
Of those I dearly love
While I am muted by unknown walls.

 EAGHL©2005

INK HITLER MUSTACHE

Question Of The Week, 3-27-17

Describe a moment you were so embarrassed you wanted to disappear.

(Comments are added to this page after you post them.  Thanks for your responses.)

Granny Annie6:56 AM

Leaving work one evening I stopped in the bathroom and glanced in the mirror. My ink pen had leaked in my hand and I had a perfect Hitler mustache across my lip. Why didn't anyone tell me??!! When I ask my coworkers the answer was "We didn't want to embarrass you." At least I knew why everyone had been smiling at me so big all afternoon.

Olga Hebert9:40 AM

I was going into work one time and someone on the street stopped me to point out my blouse was on inside out. 

Jan9:47 AM

When I find a shoe I like i get them in different colors. More than once i have found myself at work with different colored shoes

Munir9:51 AM

I know things like that can happen. It is a delicate situation though, for anyone to point out. I can understand their position

only slightly confused11:49 AM

Too many to think about, not one I'm willing to admit to lol.

Elephant's Child4:26 PM

Echoing Delores. And my memory (fortunately) is unreliable

Arkansas Patti4:37 PM

Positive it was in high school when my boyfriend tugged on a little piece of paper poking out of my V neck sweater and the toilet paper I had used to enhance my bust size unraveled perfectly in one long streamer leaving me lopsided.

River5:59 PM

I really don't remember any. I know there have been some, they must be buried too deep or I've let go of them completely.

Rob and Monica7:49 PM

I'm sure there are many. I remember going to wash my hands in the bathroom at work not long before it was time to leave. The water shot out from the faucet directly onto the front of my pants leaving a giant wet spot in a rather embarrassing area. Needless to say, I stayed late at work that day sitting at my desk doing additional work that I really didn't do that night...until my pants were dry! (Rob)

Lee1:32 AM

To be honest, off-hand, I can't think of any, but I'm sure there were many...

Tabor6:16 AM

I can't. It was in Junior HIgh School and I am too embarrassed to repeat it.

Winifred12:27 PM

I have a couple both related to stress going out to take final exams when I was studying for my degree. The first was locking the car door & realising the engine was still running. I didn't have the spare key. The second time was sitting down at the desk to read the exam paper & realising I still had my slippers on!

LL Cool Joe10:30 AM

Oh so many. The one that stands out is shutting my biker jacket in a train door and having to do a 45 minute journey up to London not being able to move until I could open the door.

 

FRIDAY FUNNIES

Thanks again to my son for sending me these this week.  Hope you enjoy.

 This one I had in my archives and have probably shown it before but it is one of my all time favorites.

My property is covered in many beautiful trees.  It is amazing to me that they can grow because all of my land is on rock.  If you don't believe me, look at what happens when a large tree is uprooted.  It brings all the rocks with it.
 

FEELS LIKE FAMILY

Two blog friends have shared their loved ones over a long period of time.  Brig on her Dad as she enjoyed his later years fishing and laughing and caring for him and Jean on her husband Wayne as they both struggled with his Alzheimers Disease.  We have accompanied them on their journeys and adventures and we have grown to love these men like family.  I grieve for Brig and Jean and for their families and I thank them for sharing these great men with us.  I am posting this in case you followed these two gals and did not know of their loss.

BRIGHID

Cleared to Climb UNLIMITED



A Mountain Too High

FOREVER LOVED

WORDS FOR WEDNESDAY

River of Drifting Through Life has again provided our Words for Wednesday.You can see what others have done in the comments on her site or here in my comment section or on their own blogs (if they tell us).  Hope you will join in with your story or poem. 

Good words River. Thanks!

Kitchen, multiple, facility, wing, gourmet, straight

and/or

pancake, flipping, considered, decent, apart, weak

 

CULINARY DREAMS by Granny Annie

Competitive cooking time

Each contestant in the KITCHEN

Not a PANCAKE in sight.

There would be no FLIPPIN'.

Lots of skills were used.

Meals by each GOURMET

Showed off extravagance,

No secrets to betray.

The chefs never CONSIDERED

Use of such a great FACILITY.

Not even the fact of being chosen

Exchanged arrogance for humility.

Starting with a DECENT number,

The challengers were MULTIPLE

Until only two remained,

Each feeling indestructible.

The meat was not of pichon

But a giant Condor WING.

Should it be torn APART

Or tied up with string?

Final contestants were WEAK

But standing tall and STRAIGHT

Each knew a great skill

Would surely seal their fate.

(We all know the champion Chef was Lee right?)

Giant Condor

Pichon (pigeon or dove)

FAMILY SAFETY

Question Of The Week, 3-20-17

If you were guaranteed the answer to one question, what would it be?

(Comments are added to this page after you post them.  Thanks for your responses.)

Lynn4:49 AM

Nothing springs to mind at all, but I like your Family Safety. They are the most important people in the world to me - I want them to be safe, always.

Tabor7:18 AM

Did I make a difference in a good way?

only slightly confused11:24 AM

Question: After the human body crashes and burns.....what is next?

Elephant's Child1:30 PM

No questions leap to mind. Or perhaps too many. Health and happiness for those I care about. Health for the world we live on. And I like Tabor's question too. A lot.

Arkansas Patti3:45 PM

Will we humans ever get it right?

Birdie5:59 PM

I would like to think I would ask what it all means. All of it. But I think it would probably scare me.

River11:07 PM

Plenty of questions I'd like the answers for, but maybe the knowing would be worse than not knowing.

Rob and Monica5:45 AM

Wow! Too much pressure to come up with one question. I would, however, like to know, once and for all, how many licks it takes to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop. The world may never know. (Rob)

Louvregirl12:40 PM

That is so hard. This might sound vain, but I would ask what Moses did. He asked the Lord God if he could 'see' his glory (or his face.) God's reply was that 'no man can see my face and live.' But in Moses's asking of the question, God devised a compromise and did do or answer his request (as God does with us, for when He can, He meets us more than halfway...) God placed Moses in the cleft of a rock and covered him with His hand. And as He passed by, he took away His hand, and showed Moses His 'back or hind parts' (...but not His face.) So Moses did and could see His glory, and he lived. 

Barb4:36 PM

No answers - I'd rather be surprised!

Lee6:57 PM

What time is lunch?

Lee6:59 PM

I can guarantee I'll get an answer to my question...because I'm the one and only who is here to give the answer!

 

SATURDAY OLDIES

I wrote the following poem in 1975 when my first marriage ended in divorce. My children were three and four at the time.


VISITATION by me
 
They run out the door
suitcases in hand.
Silent, I watch
from where I stand.
How can we pull
our children so?
They cannot decide
which way to go.
Such little children
having to face
a life's remnants
of which no trace
is left except
their existence.
Given no choice,
driven by our insistence.
I am here, he is there,
they are between
A life that won't
again be seen.

EAGHL©1975

Posted by EAGHL © 2017

FRIDAY FUNNIES

I am glad my son keeps me in Friday Funnies.  

I believe my son sent this one because of the ending to my Collected Phobias.

This week we are having lots of celebrations for my visiting Goddaughter from Los Angeles. 

Daughter, me, Goddaughter

 In the middle of the family celebrations, I got to meet with long time blog friends who are now Facebook friends. I met them in 2008 online and finally got to meet them in person.  Do you remember Cliff's blog?

Me, Cliff Morrow and Marilyn Morrow

WORDS FOR WEDNESDAY

River of Drifting Through Life has again provided our Words for Wednesday.You can see what others have done in the comments on her site or here in my comment section or on their own blogs (if they tell us).  Hope you will join in with your story or poem. 

Good words River. Thanks!

Here are the words for this week:
riverbank, leadership, impressive, watchful, gifts, cheesecake
and/or:
fountain, neck, conclusion, signed, purple, lion

I only used the first 6 this time.

ROOMMATES by Granny Annie

Blanche stood at the RIVERBANK  waiting. She was sure this was the place he designated for their rendezvous. Blanche was happy that she had attended this silly seminar. It had been about how to get along with roommates. Three women shared her home and sometimes they would also share disagreements.

The handsome man's LEADERSHIP at the gathering had been very IMPRESSIVE. It did not take long for her flirting to catch his eye.  As always Blanche had wound up getting a date with the tall, dark stranger. 

Blanche remained WATCHFUL believing he would arrive carrying GIFTS and hopefully one would be CHEESECAKE that she could take back to share.

Blanche often stayed out all night but for some reason, this felt different. That morning Dorothy, Rose and Sophia sat around the kitchen table worrying. 

THE END (or is it?)


I could have ended my story using the other six words but my heart wouldn't let me do this to Blanche...

This unknown woman had been thrown in the river and her body had drifted to the FOUNTAIN.   Her NECK was broken and the only CONCLUSION was murder.  There was a note around her neck SIGNED by the notorious PURPLE LION. It read, "Never talk to strangers!" 

TRIP TO LOS ANGELES

Question Of The Week, March 13, 2017

When and how did you last push the boundaries of your comfort zone?

  (Comments are added to this page after you post them.  Thanks for your responses.)

Lynn5:04 AM

Last Tuesday - when I decided I would do my own taxes. It took three hours, but I did it. (My beloved accountant retired. She suggested that I could do it myself online if I took my time.) 

River6:46 AM

A few months ago when I went out to dinner with girls I used to work with, and going again this coming weekend. Getting used to that, so it isn't really out of my comfort zone anymore. There was the time I agreed to be on a radio talk show with three other women I didn't know, that was a bit scary, but then I did it again and felt more comfortable. So I suppose I can't really count that anymore either. 

only slightly confused7:39 AM

I don't need to push myself beyond my 'comfort zone'. there's always someone to hand to do it for me.

Olga Hebert7:45 AM

Last week when I talked to my financial advisor and I actually listened to what she was saying rather than slipping off to la la land.

Silver Willow7:54 AM

last week, when I stopped giving in to fear and anxiety. Are you coming to LA?

Granny Annie8:36 AM

Any time I have to travel by air it is out of my comfort zone. My trip two years ago to Los Angeles to visit my goddaughter was a major event. Then we drove to San Diego to visit Ron's memorial at Ft.Rosecrans Military Cemetery.

Lisa11:40 AM

Saturday I pushed myself to figure out how to use that Fandango card that I'd been given 5 Christmases ago and went to a new kind of movie theater for this area. You must buy tickets online and then reserve a seat. Waiters come to your seat to serve you cokes and popcorn, or whatever you order... I have drunken the kool-aide. I won't be going back to any other theater from now on.

Jan11:50 AM

Getting up this morning, first day of PDTime

Arkansas Patti3:45 PM

When I climbed a ladder this morning to brush snow off my satellite dish on the roof. I am terrified of heights.

G. B. Miller7:39 AM

When I went on vacation last summer, it was my first driving vacation (or vacation of any kind) since 2008. So it was definitely out my comfort zone, with the budgeting, planning, driving, making sure we found places to stay during the July 4th weekend (and beyond) and places to visit, etc. etc.

 

COLLECTED PHOBIAS #9

COLLECTED PHOBIAS manuscript of short stories by Granny Annie
(Written as bedtime stories for my children in the 80's.)

 
THE FINAL CHAPTER

Annie sat back st her typewriter.  The job was complete.  She was proud of her efforts and had completed a short manuscript entitled COLLECTED PHOBIAS. Annie felt that she had dealt with her fears plus the fears of friends and family in an accurate and entertaining manner.  It has been fun sharing the scary but silly stories with her children.

It was 6:30 in the morning.  Time for her to stop writing because the children would be awake soon.  These early morning hours were hers...her time.  It was a beautiful day.  The birds were awake and starting to sing. Soon they would all leave for work and school.

Someone lightly touched Annie's shoulder.  She turned with a smile expecting to see one of her precious children.  Instead she stared at a faceless, tall, shadowy figure dressed in a long cloak carrying a lantern and scythe. 

"It is time" he said.

 THE END

In the quiet corner of each mind
The boogeyman lives on.
We pray for reality to stir us
So he will be gone.

EAGHL © 2017

First Week INTRUDER and OUTHOUSES
Second Week JUNE BUGS
Third Week OLD AUNT BEULAH 
Fourth Week LIFE'S PLEASURE (part one)
Fifth week LIFE'S PLEASURE (part two) and SILLY GIRL
Sixth week SCHOOL GLUE 
Seventh week PLUMBING REPAIRS (Part One) 
Eight week PLUMBING REPAIRS (Part Two)

FRIDAY FUNNIES

Cartoons of the week.  My son provided two and my niece provided one.  It runs in the family:-)

Event story

The "eyes" don't have it. Yesterday I took a trip to Muskogee with a friend. I broke my diet to eat lunch with her at El Chico's. Had to try Flautas for the first time. OMG! So good. This morning when I looked in the mirror my eyes had disappeared. I was peering through slits. So much sodium my face was swollen. Today hoping my eyes will return. LOL 
I must add that it was worth it to enjoy that great food.

BLOGAVERSARY AND JKPP BOOK

 BIG NEWS

**TODAY IS MY 12TH BLOGAVERSARY**

(Over 500,000 views of 2700 posts)

 AND

MORE BIG NEWS

It has been my privilege to participate in the JKPP (Julia Kay Portrait Party) since 2010.  There are over 900 members and 50,000 portraits submitted to the group.  Now Julia L. Kay has a book out called PORTRAIT REVOLUTION that is in print and will begin shipping April 11, 2017.  It will include 450 portraits by 200 of the members.  I am extremely proud to be one of those included and my digital painting will appear on page 103 of the book.

http://studiojuliakay.com/portraitRevolution

This is my digital work that will appear in the book as an example of painting on my Kindle.

WORDS FOR WEDNESDAY

River of Drifting Through Life is providing our WFW for March.  You can see what others have done in the comments on her site or here in my comment section or on their own blogs (if they tell us). I will be back to post my story later so be sure and check back. Good words River. Thanks!

This week's words are:

notebook, qualities, doubt, join, hundred, instead

and/or:

flying, signed, connections, manufacturer, fifth, ramp

Ok, here is my story but don't miss Tabor's that is posted in the comment section here.  It is a hoot.

 

MISSION IMPOSSIBLE by Granny Annie

Bea tried to read the writing in her notebook as the car bounced along. Was this really an interstate highway? It was in terrible shape and the qualities needed improvement. She had a lot of doubt about the information she reviewed. Would it be helpful in her efforts as she would join the hundred or more that were usually lined up for assistance?

“Thank you for driving Susan” Bea said. “We probably should have taken the back roads instead of this turnpike. That old road is probably better and wouldn't cost to drive on it.”

Susan laughed at her friend. “I know you are nervous but don't be. You have gathered all the important information and made all the right connections. You are ready to finalize the review.”

“I think I'm more nervous about your driving.' Bea said to her friend. “You were really flying to get here on time.”

Susan responded, “It was important for you to be on time. I did not want to cause you any delay. You have worried about this long enough. The government will do all they can to manufacture more reasons to deny the claim.”

The parking lot at the office of Disabled American Veterans was full to overflowing. They traveled up the parking ramp and finally found a spot on the fifth level. Susan and Bea began the hike back down to the ground floor.

Finally seated in front of the young DAV representative, he reviewed the material Bea brought. “You have certainly answered all the necessary questions.” he said. He added one document to the top of the stack and pointed at a blank line.

Bea signed and her paperwork was on the way once more. She continued to attempt proving her husband's cancer had been caused from his handling of munitions during the Korean War. She knew it would probably not be the last time she would appear in this office.

(This story was created from actual events of this day. I was the driver. LOL)

HORRIBLE AND CHILDISH

Question Of The Week, 3-6-17

What are you like when 

you don’t get what you want?

 (Comments are added to this page after you post them.  Thanks for your responses.)

LL Cool Joe5:59 AM

I rarely get my own way so I tend to quietly fume then move on. No point in causing an argument, I experienced too many of those growing up. 

only slightly confused6:47 AM

The few times I want to get 'my own way' I have to fight tooth and nail for it. What I find truly irritating is that AFTER I get my own way someone (read the hubs) always says what a great idea it was that WE had. Huh!! But seriously, I'm all growed up now and if I don't get my way I just stamp my foot and pout and ... oh, wait....

Granny Annie7:43 AM

I am the youngest and have trained my siblings well. They know it is easier to give in than fight me on having my way. It has been ages since I have had to have a "horrible and childish" fit to get my way. LOL

Tabor9:17 AM

I usually move on...UNLESS it is something very important and then I become that Italian screaming lady.

The Happy Whisk10:11 AM

I wish I had a funny or interesting answer but I'm not any different. I don't want for much. Which by the way, is heaven.

Arkansas Patti10:43 AM

I am a bit wishy washy and usually go with whatever unless I am really disappointed then I give the silent treatment.

Kay12:20 PM

I'm like Patti. I'm usually disappointed for a while and then go along with it.

Elephant's Child1:01 PM

It depends on how important it is/was to me.
If it is really important I go quiet and scheme for a change.
Mostly I move on

G. B. Miller5:03 AM

I try not to get into those kind of situations to begin with. I'm at the age where I don't like being played for a fool (happened quite a bit at work), so when someone does, I get quite vocal about it.

Rob and Monica7:32 AM

I usually move on unless I think I can get my way by trying a second time! (Rob) 

Brite Mist1:30 PM

my own way seems to be less and less important as i grow older (and perhaps wiser)

cube8:09 PM

I think it depends on the issue. If it's really important then I don't back down easily, but if it's trivial, then I go with the flow. 

River2:21 AM

It depends on what it is I've been wanting. Then again, I live alone so I'm the one who has the final say on whether or not I'm going to do what I want, or get what I want.

SUNDAY SELECTIONS

What is outside?

Guinea Fowl

Frankie chasing cats

Princess Leah hiding from Frankie.

Frankie decides to harass Slim

Maybe it is safe to eat now

Look Ma I've got a cat trapped under the wagon.

Come on out kitty I won't hurt you.

Luke Skywalker is safe

Sleep Apnea branding

Do you carry a CPAP brand on your face most of the day?

Ash Wednesday

Proof I attended Ash Wednesday services.

COLLECTED PHOBIAS # 8

COLLECTED PHOBIAS manuscript of short stories by Granny Annie
(Written as bedtime stories for my children in the 80's.)

PLUMBING REPAIRS (part two)  
click HERE if you missed part one 

John could hear Margaret tapping her foot in the kitchen.  Slowly he moved toward the sound.  John tried to ignore the rustling around him.  He was determined to concentrate on the job.  Something brushed his face.  He shuddered and moved on.

John located the busted pipe.  He folded his large frame as neatly as possible in the cramped space and began his task. The repair did not even take 10 minutes. With a sigh of relief, John packed his tools and headed back toward the pinpoint of daylight in front of him.  

The brave man was halfway to the opening when the light disappeared.  John flipped on his flashlight.  Nothing.  His batteries had failed him.  "Margaret" he called.  She did not answer.  He listened carefully to hear some noise from the house. Hoping to hear his wife's footsteps, doors opening and closing, anything.  "Hey Margaret!" he yelled in desperation.

A soft, slow hissing began to fill his senses.  Cold, cold air was encompassing him.  John began to shiver involuntarily.  Something gripped his ankle.  He tried to shake it off but whatever held him only gripped tighter.  A slimy substance began to trickle over his face and hands.  He opened his mouth to cry out but choked on the icky gunk that engulfed him.

By some miracle, the sudden shaft of light reappeared.  John shook loose from his assailant and crawled quickly to the opening at the side of his house.  He staggered inside and collapsed into his favorite easy chair.  

"Why didn't you answer me, Margaret?" John demanded.

"I was on the phone. What's the matter with you, you big sissy?" Margaret boldly inquired.

John did not answer.

No one could ever explain why such a tragedy took place in their small community.  John Edwards was still in the psychiatric hospital after having killed his wife Margaret in her sleep. He liked the hospital.  At least John would never have the need to crawl under a house again.

 EAGHL © 2017

Next Saturday THE FINAL CHAPTER



First Week INTRUDER and OUTHOUSES
Second Week JUNE BUGS
Third Week OLD AUNT BEULAH 
Fourth Week LIFE'S PLEASURE (part one)
Fifth week LIFE'S PLEASURE (part two) and SILLY GIRL
Sixth week SCHOOL GLUE 
Seventh week PLUMBING REPAIRS (Part One)