Frankie and Slim

Frankie and Slim
Happy New Year

Thursday, October 24, 2013

GET ME TO THE CHURCH ON TIME

Ron loved this 3 piece suit. He wore it on many a special occasion and I'm not sure what this important day was.
Yesterday I mowed for the last time of the season. It was sad to put the mower away because mowing has been a big part of my communion with Ron. It was like I was putting him away too. I know that I really must at some point but I cannot imagine being able to.

23 comments:

  1. I'm sending you a hug, Annie.

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  2. You are not on any specific healing schedule in your life when you lose someone you love. You do not have to put him away...you just have to add some new stuff...people and activities to your life.

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  3. I hope your loss gets better with time. Just think how happy you'll be next year when you pull out that mower again.

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  4. I agree with Tabor.. He'll always be with you and there will be new folks too, new memories and new adventures.

    lots of love and hugs..

    wish I was closer we could share bowl of chili and the iron pan cornbread I'm making..
    we'd have such a wonderful time and you could tell me lots of stories about you and ron.. I'd love to hear:)

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  5. I am sorry for your loss and sorry that things are difficult. I don't know how long you were together but I do know when you lose someone it takes a long time for the simplest things to not hurt like salt poured on an open wound...the longer you were together the longer it takes. When I lost someone I loved with all my heart people told me time heals all wounds. For years it did not. I read this poem a billion times ...Time Does Not Bring Relief: You All Have Lied ... by Edna St. Vincent Millay. I don't know how to add a link here but you can read it at
    http://www.poetryfoundation.org/poem/175761
    Somehow it helped me to know that someone else understood how deep a hurt I was feeling, and to know someone else knew the same pain but obviously survived to write the poem. Re: something else...I hope it was clear the "new guy" in my life on my blog today was a Beagle, Andy.

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  6. I can understand that feeling. Of course you are not ready to put him away and I cannot imagine that he will ever really be that far away from you. For example, pretty soon it will be time to drag out the snow blower.

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  7. I suspect it is not so much a case of "Putting him away" as it is keeping him on a back-shelf in a cabinet. He will always be there when you want him to, and may pop up when you least expect it.

    It is too soon to consider.

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  8. I think it's OK to still be grieving - it would be hard not to. (((HUG)))

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  9. Just hugs... don't know what to say...

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  10. Hello Annie
    As others have alluded there are other seasons to come - next will be leaf clearing then there's snow blowing. You may not have shared these tasks but I'm sure there will be some that remind you of the fun you had together.

    Nice photo by the way! 'Cute couple' looks like you were sharing a joke!
    Take care
    Cathy

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  11. It's the little things that mean so much in the end. The ties that bind us...and those ties will not be broken ever...regardless of whether or not you are mowing or not. And, like the cycles of nature, so does life cycle through her seasons...be kind to yourself, Annie.

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  12. Little losses....so many of them. It is going to hurt for a long, long time but it will be easier to carry. xoxo

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  13. I find it tough to give up the things that said them loudly, things of my loved passed ones. I have something from each of them in here just to remind me of how I loved them. My Gramps' Russian fur hat, my Dad's leather Backgammon board, my Mom's Girl Scout Leader uniform, I find comfort in these things.
    Folks say to take a photo n get rid of the things, but it doesn't feel the same. Somehow the item makes the love more real.

    I understand your mowing communion.
    Don't worry, Spring's right around the corner. One or two things don't take up much closet space, n are worth the comfort when you need it...

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  14. Anonymous6:31 AM

    What a beautiful picture. You looked great and your husband looked happy, too.

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  15. Great picture and even greater memories:)

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  16. Annie,

    Roy had a navy blue suit like Ron's and wore it for all important occasions.

    When he passed away in May I was going to send it to the Salvation Army and was going through the pockets. I found a wedding card with a check in it that he had forgotten to give to the happy couple.

    I have always wondered why I never received a thank you note from that bride and groom. NOW I KNOW!

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  17. Not until you feel ready - it is okay to feel these things. I have a big hug for you too. sandie

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  18. Kay
    Thanks, I needed that:)

    Tabor
    Every day is new and different and some days the tears just flow. I am getting out a lot and tonight I go to a Halloween costume party. Any ideas for a costume?

    cube
    It will be a joy every year to do the mowing and I will look forward to it.

    Sonny
    It seems I am going a lot of places these days and my sister is amazed that I go alone, but I always feel like Ron is in the passenger seat giving me driving tips. Wish I could share that meal with you.

    Aunt Betsy
    I own the works of Edna St. Vincent Millay. She is quite a poet and sometimes quite depressing as well as often uplifting. Loved meeting Andy and hope he will manage all the females in his new household.

    Olga
    No snow blower. Ron always cleared the drive with the tractor. I don't think I'll be ready for that feat so I'm planning to just have enough supplies on had in case I'm snowed in. lol

    kenju
    You know Judy, it is too soon. Suddenly I realized it's only been three months. Why does it seem like it's already been years?

    Lynn
    I'm good most days. Just once in a while it creeps up out of nowhere. Thanks for the hug.

    ancient one
    Hugs are good. Thanks.

    Cathy
    We were always sharing a joke. That was the basis of our marriage. Ron promised me a life of laughter and he sure saw that I got that.

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  19. Talon
    Sometimes when I am being kind to myself I feel guilty. The good days feel wrong. Isn't that crazy?

    Birdie
    Every day some new memory raises it's head to remind me.

    Snaggle Tooth
    His pillow, is robe, his billfold, his bandanas, his pictures, his money clip, his boots, his hats, his jackets....................

    gigihawaii
    We were very happy always, even when we were arguing.

    Changes in the wind
    Oh yes!

    Nancy
    Love it that Roy had a suit like that. We gave Ron's suit to a grandson and I'm not sure where it is now. He needed it for a special occasion and I don't think it worked but we felt good giving it. I have sacks of Ron's clothes that I need to give to the Salvation Army but can't do it yet. Don't you know Roy is laughing with you about finding that check? How funny! Love you.

    Chatty Crone
    That's the big question, when will I ever feel ready. Thanks for the hug.

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  20. No rush. We never really get over losing those we love but it's more like we slowly learn to live with the memories. I mowed today and then cleaned the mower. I'm not sure if it's the last mowing of the season. Will have to wait and see how much sun we get. I have not been blogging for quite some time, too much else to do and I do have Facebook to keep me updated. I pray that you will have a pleasant winter and be well. Hugs!

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  21. There is no rush and I feel such a deep love and commitment you have. Take your time - he would want you to!

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  22. Mountain Mama
    Nice to know another mower. Been missing you so now I know you have deserted blog world for Facebook like so many others. I do both.

    JeanMac
    I often think of what Ron would want me to do. Though you still have Wayne, I know that you remember his better days and live also knowing what he wanted for you.

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  23. Well I'm not going to put MTL away ever.
    In over the remaining years the memories start to fade it won't be my doing. It's been nearly 9 months and the thought of him and all he was is a great comfort to me.

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