Christmas 2014

Christmas 2014

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

TUNING YOUR TONE

Does it ever seem that you are getting a lot of negative feedback on something you say? If you respond with astonishment over a surprising angry response to a seemingly innocent comment you are told "Well it was your tone".


Smoking for years did not helped my voice.  Once a speech major and award winning orator, I am no longer able to enunciate as was once possible and my voice range is limited. More often than not the content of message is misconstrued and  I am admonished for my tone of voice.


Of course, once in a while, I am being very sarcastic:)

18 comments:

Lynn said...

When I supervised people, I heard that some, "It's the way you said it." So I got self-conscious over how I worded things to employees. I think that might have been a guilt thing though. :)

♥ Sonny ♥ said...

You, sarcastic. Surely you jest:) rofl..

My voice is sorta deep and raspy too and I have to be careful to smile when I say stuff.. on the other hand , it helped a lot when I was running crews of men on jobsites.

Thats what I love about blogging.
everybody thinks I'm sooooo sweet..
ahh if they only knew..
hugs
Sonny

Bonnie said...

I love your sarcasm. I guess because I'm sarcastic too. Funny that Sonny said everyone thinks she's sweet on her blog. I get in trouble for my tone sometimes on my blog but alot on FB. Most of the time they are correct, lol. But how they can detect my tone in writing is a mystery to me. And those who judge, evidently don't know you.

Granny Annie said...

Lynn -- I was a manager as well and was often told "It's the way you said it." I don't know why employees told me that and never said it to a guy manager. ???

Sonny -- You truly have opened my eyes to a new you. You have burst the image I had of you as a sweetie pie. Now what?

Bonnie -- It's all my mother's fault. The sarcasm comes from her side of the family so I learned from the best and simply cannot help myself. Where does yours come from?

LL Cool Joe said...

I often think the sweeter the "tone" the nastier the person. Give me a bit gruffness any day!

Granny Annie said...

LL Cool Joe -- You just might have something there. I think I agree.

Tabor said...

I can be just plain sarcastic and I do not have the tone of my voice to blame it on unfortunately.

Shionge said...

It is so true as sometime the tone of voice could result in misunderstanding between colleagues, friends and spouses etc.

Chatty Crone said...

Well I have to be honest - a tone makes a big difference to me - but it is also the look that goes with it - and also some people are more blunt then others - and there is also the body language - so much makes up what is said. Love, sandie

Pat MacKenzie said...

I find my writing 'tone' can easily come across as rude or ignorant when I'm just trying to be funny or sarcastic. There should be a special punctuation mark to designate sarcasm in writing. I guess that's what 'smilies' are for.

Whitemist said...

I have a dog who says nothing, but the tone in that look!

Cliff said...

Yeah, I rewrite a lot of stuff to get the 'tone' right.
Sarcasm, you, oh balogna.

Rachel said...

You? Sarcasm? NEVER!!! Ha!

I can only recall once that someone told me "well just listen to the tone of your voice!" I didn't think I was loud but I was trying to get my point across. I reckon it was working!!

Cathy said...

Hello Annie
Me - well at times in real life I can be all sweetness and light, depends whether the receiver cottons on or not:))

Yes its true - our pets can say not much at all but still have a 'tone' lol
Take care
Cathy

Cathy @ Still Waters

Granny Annie said...

Tabor -- Plus it sounds like you're proud of it:)

Shionge -- I don't mind it when they get my tone of voice, but sometimes they totally mistake the message I'm trying to convey.

Chatty Crone -- My mother had a lot of "tone" in her facial expressions. She usually did not need to speak a word to get her messages across to us, especially in church.

Pat MacKenzie -- You are so right about punctuation for sarcasm and I agree that the smiley face could be it. I use that a lot:)

Whitemist -- My dog's bark definitely has a tone. A loud bark outside means she is on watch for predators. A soft barking means she would like to come inside.

Cliff -- Salami, Salami, Bologna:)

Rachel -- But the "tone of voice" inside my head seems to be different from what people outside my head are hearing.

Cathy -- I love it that you said "cottons on". I haven't heard that expression in a long time and it is definitely a part of my understanding. Some might say that a dog doesn't have facial expressions but our Slim sure does have expressive tones and I know just what she means.

G. B. Miller said...

My vocal tone is somewhat neutrual in that I really don't change it much when I speak.

Except for showing off my talents for inflection and getting people to turn beet red because of it.

However, my tone translates exceptionally well to my e-mails, mostly because I don't deal with stupid and I'm very short with people to whom I have treat like a 2nd grader in order to get my point across.

In my world, it seems that more edjicashun one has, the more words you need to use in order to get your point across.

For instance, if you have to give me a 150 word e-mail that basically says "I don't understand", you're gonna get a pointed reply from me treating you like a toddler.

cube said...

Don't take that tone with me, young lady ;-)

There's an old saying, "It's not what you say, but how you say it", and it's partially true, but I believe there are some things that are going to sound bad no matter what the tone. That's life.

BTW I think the emoticon for sarcasm is /s (meaning sarcasm off)

Bonnie said...

To answer your question about where my sarcasm comes from...I believe my dad. He was sarcastic, but also had an awesome sense of humor.