WHEN TO YELL FIRE

These are my testimonials to the fact that we should always heed warnings from Smokey The Bear and other wise firefighters. Here are two fire incidents in my life. A friend of mine on Facebook reminded me of this first incident.

Incident One:

I do not smoke but my non-smoking only started five years ago. Before that I smoked like a chimney. Before total bans occurred in the workplace, those of us with private offices were allowed to smoke in our offices. The bad thing about my office was that it was totally glass. People entering the bank could easily see if I was in because they could see a cloud of smoke. One particularly slow day I decided to touch up a chipped fingernail and did so very quickly, not wanting to be caught working on my nails. Shortly thereafter I decided to have a cigarette. I was smoking as I looked across the lobby to see our bank president and the switchboard operator staring at me in horror. It seems that I was ON FIRE! The cigarette had caught my newly polished nail on fire and I had scratched my head without realizing it and my hair was on fire. As I put the fire out, I noticed the two across the lobby rolling on the floor in hysterics. (And no, they made no efforts to extinguish my burning hair.)

Incident Two:

My freshman year in college my efforts to blend socially were not going well. My greatest fear was if I attended one of the many college parties I would be totally excluded. Finally my roommate Mary talked me into attending a lake party with a large group from our dorm. Surely I would feel comfortable with my friends surrounding me. Walking into the crowd I was immediately hit with discomfort. I found myself in the forever role of wallflower. A good idea was to hold a drink and I was near the dessert table so I was able to help myself to the delicious punch. Later I learned that punch was made of Ever clear and Orange Juice. Gradually I began to feel a little more comfortable and was watching the people on the dance floor. Someone said something funny and I threw my head back in laughter. Then my most frightening expectation came true as everyone at the party attacked me and started beating on me. This attack was not because they didn't like me however, it was because, yep, I was ON FIRE! When I threw back my highly hair sprayed head, it went into a candle and ignited. The people are the party were only putting me out not beating me up. Needless to say, I was never ignored at parties after that. Everyone knew who "Annie" was!

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Yesterday was at Nora's Chez Pez.