Frankie and Slim

Frankie and Slim
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Monday, November 09, 2015

DISTANCE YOURSELF

Question Of The Week 11-9-15

How do you know when to end a friendship 
and how do you end it?


 

12 comments:

  1. It's very difficult to end any relationship, well it is for me because I'm very loyal. I had a very good male friend that I've had for years, sadly he told me stuff that I didn't want to know about and was shocked. As I was also friends with his wife as well, I didn't feel I could carry on being his friend. I didn't tell him that but I told him I wasn't comfortable about what I now know about him, since then the friendship has simply fizzled out. I wouldn't ignore him if we spoke, but I wouldn't go out of my way to see him again, and he senses that.

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  2. This has actually happened to me twice in the last few years. Both friends with similar personalities - domineering, who were always sneaking in barbs. I decided in both cases that life was just too short to spend time with people who make me feel bad about myself. With one of them, I just stopped getting in touch and it fizzled. The other one ended with some emailing back and forth - I finally let her have the last word. I feel lighter without them in my life - I was thinking they should get together and be friends. :)

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  3. I have few real friends and we have been thus for years. I have moved away from or taken another job that has relieved me of being nice to someone I no longer liked. But I cannot remember having had to break off a true friendship. I guess I am lucky in that...or unlucky in that I have so few friends?

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  4. Sometimes you just have to move on. Time and lots of space have separated me from some friends, but new ones seem to arrive and my life goes on.

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  5. I tend not to end friendships. I am still in touch with the friends that I grew up with in the same neighborhood. However, occasionally a friend will continually treat me or the things that I believe in with disrespect. A person can believe different things than I do, and we can discuss what we believe, but when ridicule and disrespect happen, it's over. Usually I just make space by breaking contact with them, don't call, don't answer calls, sit at a different lunch table, that sort of thing.

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  6. Never easy. To do, or to have it done to you.
    I avoid conflict and let contact lapse. Not perfect. But less unpleasant.

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  7. I don't have a lot of friends, but I have learned that to have a friend you have to be one. Only have ditched one and that was just by not responding to her any more. As I age I find I value the differences in my friends as much as the similarities.

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  8. If friendships are true...then I don't think they ever end, even of either party doesn't see or speak to each other for years on end. In a true friendship you can always just pick up from where you left of...no matter how much time has passed in between...

    If the "friendship" is really a friendship as such, but just a light relationship, closer to being an acquaintance type connection, then it is pretty simple just to distance yourself from the other person...without making any fuss or ado...in my opinion. :)

    If they don't get the message...then be upfront and direct.

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  9. When you feel deceived, or robbed, or too one-way, the trust is over. I tend to give second chances tho, n try not to end friendships. Most have carried on many decades, n can pick up where left off being too busy.

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  10. I let things fizzle out when I'd rather not spend time with someone. A couple of times I have actually had a "break up" talk with a friend, but they always want another chance and in the end I can't find it in my heart to refuse to their face. Then I end up back in the same position as before. Therefore not getting in touch is how I roll.

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  11. I'm with Lee and Snaggle Tooth. If you have no trust, there can be no friendship.

    Also, when I'm putting in a hell of a lot more than the "friend" is, it's usually not a friendship anymore.

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  12. I've learned that sometimes you have to let negative people go if you can no longer help them and they are bringing you down too much.

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