Slim and Franke

Slim and Franke
Happy New Year

Tuesday, December 08, 2009


It is a time that many of us are torn between posting on our blogs or on Facebook.

Facebook requires and invitation and once you have mutually accepted, you can push open the screen door and walk in without knocking.

Blogs are like giant billboards. As you drive life’s highway one catches your eye and you check further into the subject only to become a fan. (Or not).

Facebook is perfect for keeping up with family because you catch a glimpse and know that all is well with them for that day.

A problem arises when you begin to find yourself thinking of blog readers as friends and/or family. If and when they disappear you can only imagine where they went but if you never knew their real name you simply will not hear from them again. Ouch!

This year in March, I lost a blog friend to death. I knew she died but her family first blocked who could view her past posts then deleted the blog later. So with the click of someone’s mouse the face of Beverly Finely of BEVERLY BITES was yanked away. No one close to her knew I had followed her blog and corresponded with her and that I felt the loss. I could not go back and view her posts that made me laugh or made me cry and I will never know how her sister Dolly is doing, how her sons and grandchildren are getting along, how her dear friend Bruce is and what about her big dog Cletus, the Red Hats and what is going on at the Tavern?. Well, she really wasn’t my friend or family……..was she?

The next to go this year was Linda G who also signed in as she-of-little-brain. Her posts on ONE ACRE WOOD were right up my alley and we had a grand time reading each other’s posts. On the day in May, 2009, she left blog world after she commented very nicely about me and my blogging and then, poof, she was gone. Her blogs are still there SPEAKING OUT ON FREEDOM and PRESCOTT PAST so maybe there is a chance she will return. At least when the blog is deleted we know not to keep watching for them.

Sammy of I THINK I CAN, I THINK I CAN… is a huge shocker to lose. She told us in September how busy she was and she told us she was having a difficult time juggling work and family. She said she would probably slow down posting. Instead she disappeared, blog and all. We wonder to ourselves if something happened to her or her spouse or their beautiful son and we can only offer a prayer of concern.

Then there is the paranoia that comes with the possible fact I am the only person they have excluded and perhaps that is intentional. Maybe Beverly’s family did know who I was and deleted my access because... Maybe Linda G and Sammy told everyone but me where they were going next?

Maybe these are the very reasons that Facebook is less painful. You know that the people you follow are real. You know where you can find them if they stop posting. But you never get the benefit of their profound essays on life like you do on the blogs.

P.S. If you are planning to stop blogging, email me first would you or post a final entry that says “I’m outta here but I’m okay.”


  1. I know what you mean! I love my blogging friends, a few I know in person, but most of them I have met thru blogging.

  2. I don't do Facebook and I never will. I do think bloggers are real though, but I know what you mean.

    The only reason I'd stop blogging without at least giving all my readers an explanation, is if I died. Plain and simple.

    I love my blog, and would never give it up unless I was too ill to continue.

    I may find it harder to find interesting topics to write about, but I'd just blog a bit less, never just go.

    I think it's insulting to my followers actually. To disappear without an explanation is like a real slap in the face.

  3. I do both facebook and blog. I have grown quite fond of a handful of bloggers and understand the loss you feel when they leave. There are only a select few that I correspond with outside of my blog and the friendships are just as real as "real life" ones. I find facebook satisfying because at a glance I can see who is there and how they are doing. Love that. Blogging has slowed down considerably on my part. As well as my readership probably because I'm not as regular as in the past.

    I promise I won't leave without letting you know.....If you do the same for me! ;P

  4. As you know, I do both. I resisted Facebook for quite a while, but I find I like it very much. You are right that it doesn't really take the place of good blog posts. I promise to let you know if I disappear - please do the same for me.

  5. I don't really like Facebook. I'd rather blog! If I need a break, I'll tell you.

  6. I hate it when bloggers quit and you don't know what happens to them. I think they should let us know if they are quitting or taking a break, so at least we don't worry that something horrible happened. If I quit with no word then you'll know I've kicked the bucket. I just wouldn't leave my blogger friends dangling. The only other reason I can think of is if I was hurt really bad and couldn't post, but as long as I could talk I'd have a family member get onto my site and post why I was absent.

    I really hate that Sammy quit. You do feel like you know them and their families and then..they disappear.

    I do Facebook some but not too much. I don't blog too much either. It's all about the time issues involved! But I love blogging and especially my blogging friends!!

  7. That's really sad.

    Have to say I really can't be bothered with Facebook. I've tried it but I get overloaded with it. People probably think I'm horrible when I don't reply to their requests. I do reply if they ask me to be their friend but not the others, there are so many!

    What I do like about the blogs is that you feel you get to know people, their families, their thoughts and what's happening in their lives. They are people you never would meet in everyday life but blogs transport us across the globe, thoughts, warts and all!

  8. Forgot to say that I always try to get people's email addresses and can get in touch this way. Not everyone puts their email address on their profile unfortunately.

    Please do add your email address so we can keep in touch.

  9. Wow, I can relate to what you're saying after the death of Trish from "I Slept With Robert DeNiro...But About My Cancer," who was a friend of a friend, but who I only knew through blogging. It was painful reading her final post (written by one of her friends who let us know she'd passed away).

    You know my e-mail and you know my real name. If I stop blogging without an explanation, you'll know something DRASTIC happened... and you'll know where to find me.

  10. Yes, I wondered about Sammy as well, but do see her posting on Facebook occassionally. I enjoy my blogging friends, and would hate to see them dissapear without a word. I blog infrequently these days, but am very active on Facebook. Lots of friends and family on there that I enjoy. It's like holding conversations with people. Blogging taskes more of an effort, and I just don't have the time for it and Facebook and Twitter. So Facebook it is, most of the times.

    Got to run. Take care!
    When I quit, I will post about it.

  11. I don't do Facebook either, and I plan to blog until my fingers fall off :)

  12. Very well written.

  13. Patti -- I have missed three opportunities to meet blog friends in person. I'm hoping to have more chances that will turn out with successful get-togethers.

    Cool Joe -- You've got two nice blogs going and you spend lots of time keeping them interesting.

    Oh Great One -- we've been blog friends a long time. You and I both lost Sprinkle for a while but she came back and even though she doesn't post,we know she it out there.

    Kenju - I'll never know where you get the time to post your totally interesting blog plus add lots of information on your facebook. I'm betting you never sleep. If I am unable to continue my blog, a family member will notify m pals.

    Kay Dennison -- You last "break" went a bit long and some of us were ready to call out the blog patrols!

    Rachel -- Yes our blog friends become so important to us. I guess Sammy is okay because Renie mentions that she sees her on facebook. That's a relief.

    Winifred -- I loved this statement you made: "blogs transport us across the globe, thoughts, warts and all!" My email address is listed under the "view my complete profile" section.

    lly -- But something drastic ALWAYS happens to you! LOL

    Renie -- Thanks for letting me know that Sammy is okay. I wouldn't have found her on facebook because I didn't know her name.

    Riot Kitty -- So happy you plan to ride off into the sunset on your blog! Just so you remember to say Happy Trails! I promise to do the same.

  14. I finally submitted to FB but because I am icognito on Blogger there are just a few crossovers. My problem with FB is that so many of my family and friends don't post anything except various icons for various levels of success or various virtual lives or games...ugh!

    I have lost two blogmates over the years. At least one of their blogs is still up and I visit there as if visiting a grave stone. Other bloggers have disappeared without a wave.

  15. Sprinkle is on facebook Grannie Annie!

  16. I am still resisting FB because of the time it would involve even though I realise that I have lost blogging friends to FB. My daughter in Vietnam and I keep a check on each other's health through my blogging. If I miss a few days, she emails to ask if I'm O K. Similarly, if my flag counter shows that no-one from Vietnam has viewed my blog for days, I email her toask if all's well with her! Of course the latter wouldn't work if other people in VN were to view my blog!

  17. Annie, my daughter got me started on blogging several years ago and I loved it.... A friend of mine finally got me to do Facebook and I like it too, for different reasons.. I like that I can keep in contact with my daughter while she is in college and see what she is up I enjoy some of the political bantering with friends and the every day activities of some others.

    I will always blog, but probably not as much... I have just received a new calling at church that will keep me pretty busy so I don't know how much of either I will be doing....

    I love your blog and hope to check in on you often...

  18. It's almost like you were reading my mind. I know time issues keep me away from blogging and I try to read the few blogs I follow even if I don't leave a comment. I will always let you know if I'm taking a hiatus from blogging. I resisited FB for a long time, but I enjoy keeping in touch with family and friends that way. I consider most of my blogging friends to be actual friends since we keep in touch in other ways also. My blogging friends are the ones I turn to in time of need to help me sort out my issues. Thank you, Annie, for being one of them. I am fortunate that I haven't lost any bloggers from passing away, but like you, some have just gone away. I do miss them, but life does go on.

  19. I love blogging and FB. I enjoy the ease and quickness of FB. It allows me to pop on for a few minutes and post some comments on what others have written. I love being able to keep in touch easily, and FB allows that. Blogging takes time. I think its rewards are deeper than FB since we get to really know people through their blogs.
    I will start my new blog one of these months, and I will certainly send you an invite.
    I think of my blog buddies as friends. To me, they are real people, and some of them (like you) are people I've grown to really care about and enjoy knowing.

  20. Oh Annie~
    I so agree with you. My followers have become friends who brighten my day.
    I hope maybe when I die my children will have mine printed~for in it I have shared my heart and soul!
    You have a Merry Christmas

  21. Yes, I wondered about Sammy as well, but do see her posting on Facebook occassionally. I enjoy my blogging friends, and would hate to see them dissapear without a word. I blog infrequently these days, but am very active on Facebook. Lots of friends and family on there that I enjoy. It's like holding conversations with people. Blogging taskes more of an effort, and I just don't have the time for it and Facebook and Twitter. So Facebook it is, most of the times. sports picks